Can Setback be Triumphs?

Well it's Sunday morning and I wish I was worshipping with my family, but instead I'm home. Just a quick update on my physical issues, the back feels pretty good. I went to physical therapy last week, and somehow managed to irritate a nerve on my right side. Same type of pain, same issues, other side of the body. It can't be a disc bulge, cause there isn't any disc left. Could be inflammation, could be scar tissue. Whatever is causing the pain (and I mean serious pain) it's like a swift kick. Seems like I take a step forward and then fall back a few feet.

I don't know why I am struggling physical like I am, but it may be a blessing and a triumph. I have felt called to do a few different ministry things, like The Revolution Inversion stuff. I'll admit that it's scary to try to start a non-profit that you will make you living from. I want to do ministry for kids in Sioux City and I want to be able to serve people God has put in my life. Instead, I just went and found a job. I didn't do what I feel like I should because of fear. God may be removing my ability to avoid what I've been called to do.

I don't know for sure what is going to happen. I know there are some opportunities that God has given me. I am going to continue to pray and move forward and make wise decisions. It's important to me to take care of my family, to meet my obligations and pay my bills. On the other hand, I also know that I need to trust God with my life, finances and well being. It's a hard line to walk. I am praying that I will have wisdom to make the right choice. Please pray for me too, that I know what I should do and how to proceed. Pray for my family that we can have unity in purpose and mind, that there isn't fear or strife created by any decision that is made. Life and family and work and income, it's all a balancing act, and I don't want to upset the balance. On the other hand, I can't ignore the call God has given me and just pretend like my life is my own that I can do what I want. I gave Him my life, I am His servant, and I cannot be disobedient and be blessed.

When a shepherd has a lamb that wanders and won't follow, he breaks the leg of that lamb. He then carries the lamb everywhere so it becomes dependent on the shepherd. My bones are in tact, but I still need to be carried, so maybe I need to learn to be dependent on the shepherd more and on my own abilities a little less. I hope you can relate and are learning to be dependent on the shepherd too. I'd love to hear your story if you would like to share.